Who Am I?

I was an average student in my sleep but never tried to apply myself. I dropped out of most everything I did that challenged me or would have helped me in this world. I never pursued my dreams. I never thought I was good enough to succeed in what I wanted to do. I never went to college. Though I've always wanted to. I never believed I could. I was afraid of rejection, afraid of failing, afraid of the unknown. I never tried. Without trying, I could never fail.

Where did these fears come from? Could be from being rejected from my own father as a child. From not having friends to push me to try harder. From not pushing myself to try. From lacking the confidence in myself. From letting fear into my life. But mostly from letting fear rule my life. Because I feared, I never tried. Because I never tried, I failed.

But WHO AM I?

I am a dreamer. I now believe my dreams matter and they can come true. I have goals that I feel I can accomplish. I am no longer afraid to fail. I am only afraid to not try. 

I am a wife to my loving husband of ten years. I am a mother of two beautiful children that mean the world to me, Emily 8 and Noah 6. I am a daughter and a sister. I am a Baptist. I am the VBS director at my church for the past six years now. I am a Primary Sunday School teacher since Nov 2014 and the Hot Tots Teacher (Toddler Jr Church) for 16yrs before that. I am a Faith Bible Institute student for the past two years. One more year until I graduate.

My goals:

- To lose 60 more pounds but ultimately to be healthy and athletic like I once was. 

- To start Olympic College Fall 2016. I love to learn. It's time I learn some more. 

By accomplishing these goals, I feel that I will find the me I know is inside. The me I've been afraid to let out and succeed in this world. For once, I am not afraid of who I am.

Day 1 of Giving Thanks

I am Thankful for my wonderful baby (who just turned 5) boy, Noah. He has been stubborn & hard headed with a temper since birth. He challenges me as a mother all day, everyday. But he is also the sweetest, lovable little man with a very sensitive heart & spirit who loves to cuddle with his mommy every night. He is adventurous & curious of the world around him, though he is often afraid to try new things right away. He is always wanting to know how something was made or how it works. He is generous & willing to give up things that he wants to please others. He loves to learn & picks up on things fast. I love my little man & I thank God for allowing me to be his mother.

Now

Boy did I have a crazy busy summer. Directed VBS the last week of June. Mom visited in July. Took our BBC teens to Northwest Youth Camp the first week of Aug, which was a blast & I'm looking forward to next year. A lot more happened but I decided to go with the big events quickie.
Spent a wonderful family day in Seaside, Oregon. Finally have a reason to like Oregon :) Absolutely beautiful there. My sister & I took our kids to opening day at the Puyallup Fair. Of course it was a super hot day so we were somewhat miserable but still managed to have a great day :)
Emy started school on the 5th of September. She loves her school & was super excited about starting Kindergarten. She is definitely more comfortable this year & has made two new friends already :) Emily does keep trying to skip school, as she is not used to going to school five days instead of two yet.
I bought a Preschool book to start going through with Noah since he can't start preschool until next year. We have worked in it twice now & I can't believe how quickly he has picked up on it all. He traces lines & letters perfectly, well as perfectly as my handsome three year old can anyways :) Still working on recognition of letters but he can count to 10. Still don't know if he will be right or left handed. He seems more comfortable left handed but he keeps swapping.
Rich has finally come back home to a normal work schedule. Well as normal as a grave shift schedule can be haha. Military duties kept him away for about a week. Yes, I know I am incredibly blessed that it was only a week & that he was just a couple hours away, but its still a hard adjustment for our children who have recovered nicely with daddy back home now.
As for me, I am surviving. Had a pretty good schedule going but now with school in the mix & Rich's school schedule about to be thrown in I am trying to readjust. As you can tell me being up at 1am is not part of the schedule. Actually makes for a rough day, but I had coffee a little too late in the evening. So here I am still wide awake, typing away on a blog that I haven't written in for months & even reading through Twitter feeds so I can check up on my Y&R peeps. Yes, I am a HUGE fan of The Young & the Restless & have been since I was 12yrs old. Anyways, I have hit a plateau in my weight loss but on the plus side I have lost 20lbs since Jan. I am back under 200 which is closer to where I belong but I still have a few lbs to loose..
Well, there it is. The update of our precious little family. Now I'm going to attempt some sleep so my kids can enjoy my company tomorrow.

The Weekend

Friday Jan 20th they actually closed both Tacoma Narrows bridges. There were large chunks of ice falling onto the road from above.

I cancelled another Party Lite gathering on Sat but the weather didn't give me much of a choice.

Yesterday we finally ventured back out of the house. We went to church. The parking lot was icy but perfectly fine otherwise.

Today, black ice claimed a life. The snow was fun, but not enjoying the ice at all. Praying for the family of this lady who died trying to help another from their crashed car.

Thursday

Jan 19th we woke up to the same snow. So we decided to... go for a walk...

It took us 45min to walk a 10min walk...

A lot of falling in the snow...

Saw some very nice Snowmen, woman & bear....

What walk doesn't have at least one fit thrown?
Snow Angel on Ice...